In her August 24, 1915 column, I come to know my great-grandmother as something of a radical, not quite a feminist as we understand the term today, but unquestionably bold for her generation. As I read her reflections on remaining single in the absence of a suitable husband, I found myself quietly cheering in admiration. Her views were strikingly progressive given the rigid social expectations placed upon young women of that era.
While des Bois acknowledges the limited options available to women and the immense pressure to marry young, she refuses to frame singleness as a condition of failure or misfortune. On the contrary, she suggests that remaining single may, in fact, be a desirable state. That was a daring assertion within the historical and social climate of her day. Even though she attributes a religious dimension to single life, it is evident that she regards it as potentially more rewarding, perhaps even more fulfilling, than marriage, with all its inherent responsibilities, trials, and sacrifices.
Above all, des Bois dismisses any sense of urgency in making life-altering decisions such as taking a husband. Discernment and deliberation are virtues she consistently promotes. She encourages women to choose for themselves, as far as circumstances allow, and to do so wisely, thoughtfully, and in their own time. Within the constraints of her generation, this call to define one’s life on one’s own terms feels quietly revolutionary.
Having spent forty years working in the field of education, first as a teacher and later as a school administrator, I remain a steadfast advocate for formal learning, particularly for women. I believe deeply that women must be equipped with the knowledge and expertise necessary to sustain themselves independently, both economically and socially. This conviction is one I continue to share with my daughters and with every young woman I have the pleasure and honor of knowing.
So when des Bois, herself a former teacher, wrote more than a century ago in her column that “with a diploma in hand a woman can live comfortably,” I felt an immediate kinship. In her affirmation of education and a life of meaningful work for women, my great grandmother strikes within me an intellectual and deep personal chord. What a meeting of the mind and heart despite the fact that we never knew each other given the two generations that separate us. Across generations, however, we meet in a shared belief that education grants women both dignity and freedom.
Denise Larrivee
On Fashion, Folly, and the Quiet Power of Simplicity
The Oscars, the annual event recognizing the past year’s best in film, took place this past weekend, and it admittedly snuck up on me. Not owning a TV over the past few years has left me a little out of the loop, not that this is necessarily a bad thing, given how overly hyped the…
On Gossip and the Quiet Harm of Words/Technology
My great grandmother lived most of her life in the small towns and rural communities of western Manitoba during a time when fast and efficient communication was virtually nonexistent. Apart from face-to-face contact, communication between residents was limited, as technologies such as telephone systems were not yet widely available. Churches, schoolhouses, the post office, and…
Leave a Reply